Isn’t it weird how this week had no Tuesday? Like, we all went to bed on Monday and woke up on Wednesday. Welp, good thing we didn’t spend any time dwelling on it, right?
- All my roommates were here when I went to make coffee this morning. It was like 10:30 AM. Why the fuck were they here getting in my way?
- I know how much everyone loved the first Sandwich Wednesday [Wait, last Sandwich Wednesday was a Tuesday. Did I accidentally erase Tuesday? –Ed.], so I brought it back. This week I had a chicken parm from Bub and Pop’s in Dupont Circle
It was too garlicky, which isn’t a real problem. Also it was a bit messy, which is also not a real problem.
- I got my sandwich through UberEATS, and I’m starting to realize that between that, Highspeed Juice, living catercorner to a bar and living above a Chinese restaurant I never have to leave my block.
- I took a walk down to The Mall today. I really appreciate all the tourists who wear shirts indicating what city or state they’re from. When I’m left to guess, my go to is always Minnesota.
- I was on The Mall to check out the Smithsonian Folklife Festival highlighting the Basque culture and “the sounds of California.” It was cool seeing dudes build boats and harvest salt, but how does a Basque and California festival not have cider and wine?
- My sister Katie is soon to join me in funemployment, and tonight was her going away drinks. It was fun talking to people who had questions about my funemployment and I got to rant about the DC government a lot. Also, my other sister, Liz, and I planned our future billion-dollar business.
- I met up with Alec Guinness Cat Laural for drinks at Right Proper to share stories of our failed quests for true love. Every time I go into Right Proper I know less and less of the staff, and it isn’t as fun, but I still love that place.
- On my walk home a dude in a suit cut a huge fart right after he walked past me. “I was much better at stifling my laugh than you were stifling that fart!” is what I wanted to yell at him.
Price is Right-cap
They played Rat Race again already, and it was terrible. The contestant only won 2 rats, and when she chose the pink rat Drew said “women always pick the pink rat” which I don’t think is accurate, but is pretty sexist. When her rat finished, she bent down and gave it a li’l kiss. It was adorable
Best Moment: There was a southern preacher on this week, and his inability to speak in anything below a shout really stole my heart.
Worst Moment: Price is Right had a home-smoker as a prize and it wasn’t a Big Green Egg.
By the Numbers
So apparently my phone tracks my steps for the day, so I’m going to add that to this section
Step Count: 17,581
Sobriety: 3/10. I had 6 beers today.
Healthy Eating: 3/10. Aside from that chicken parmesan masterpiece all I had today were a few tatchos and nachos.
Sanity: 7/10. I actually heard the words “you’re surprisingly sane today.”
True Love: 0/10. I did not find true love today.